Kelly's DAY SEVENTEEN

Today was a tough day...in general.

You know you're in for a GREAT day when you go to get your two-year-old, and there's poo smeared everywhere.  I don't even know how she got it out of her diaper!  The diaper was still in tact!  Anyhow, the sweet little thing said (as I was cleaning poo off her walls), "Thank you, Mommy, for cleaning the poo off my wall."  How do you get mad at THAT?
So, that's how it started...

I went to Bible study, where there was some fantastic looking chocolate cake with peanut butter frosting.  There was also a fruit salad that looked fantastic, but someone "messed with it," and therefore, it was NOT okay to eat.  Bummer.  It seriously looked and smelled amazing.

Lunch: "Israeli salad"  We recently went to Israel, and in Israel, they start off every meal with "salad."  It's miniscule chopped cucumbers, tomatoes, red onion, olive oil, salt, pepper, and lemon juice.  I make it every so often now.

I had a couple spoonfuls of peanut butter today (I'm seriously nervous that my body is not getting enough protein, for some reason, although, if you read my post yesterday, you know that I've gone through 1 and a half jars of peanut butter in the last 17 days-Pretty sure I'm getting ENOUGH).

I had an avocado for an afternoon snack, ran 5 miles, and then had bell peppers and hummus for dinner.

Spiritually speaking...
A lot of things are all jumbled up in the wash right now...spiritual things...things God is working through and out in me...things I still can't put into words yet, because they don't make sense to me.  And, if that doesn't make sense to you, or you would like me to go ahead and just spat it out on paper here, forget it.  That post would be a billion pages long, but so you get an idea of what I'm talking about, read on:

I was telling Dallas the other night..."You know how they say they can see the light at the end of the tunnel?  And, then there are those people who say they can't even see the end of the tunnel?  I feel like I stepped into a tunnel at some point, the tunnel disappeared, and now I'm just standing in blackness.  No tunnel to follow, no road even.  No light at 'the end.'  No end in sight."   This is in relation to our adoption, not this fast or my faith.  On the contrary, I KNOW my God has this entire tunnel mapped out.  He knows where the end is.  He IS the light.  I don't even need to know those details right now.  All I need to know is that HE is the ALPHA and the OMEGA, the FATHER to the FATHERLESS, the EVERLASTING FATHER.

You might be wondering what this has to do with eating.  It has EVERYTHING to do with eating, because when you take away what consumes you, THEN God can "get to work" in you!  If it weren't for this fast, my jumbled mess would just remain a jumbled mess, and I would obliviously continue on in my life thinking that I was trusting and resting in God.  In stripping my diet down to only fruits and veggies, I'm stripping off that "top layer" where I can put on my "christian girl costume," and all that's left is "REAL Kelly.  RAW Kelly."  The stuff that bandaids won't cover up.  The stuff that God will deal with is exposed.  It's a weird place to be, "exposed."  But, HE is refining me.  I feel like this is REALLY the first time I have actually allowed Him to be the "Potter."  It's the first time that I've been okay with being pummeled and reshaped into HIS design. 

So, Day 17...good riddance.
And, Lord Jesus!  If I am the clay, please tell me you're making a SMALL pot!!